Holding onto Peace

I felt so tired tonight and I asked God why. Why should I be this tired on a Monday? He gently reminded me of my meltdown this morning. He’s told me that a lot lately. I lack energy for no apparent reason. I’m healthy. I’m resting. I’ve resumed my spiritual disciplines. I’m taking regular sabbatical time. I continually sift through the things I do, to be sure I’m only doing what God would have me do. Everything should be great. I shouldn’t get this tired.

He reminded me that every time I have a meltdown, every time I worry, every time I fail to trust Him … even for 10 minutes … I exhaust my energy. I can’t keep doing that. He’s said it before and He said it again tonight. It’s not what I do, it’s how I do it that costs me.

I can’t keep climbing out of that place of peace and rest in God. I have to stay in His rest. I have to learn not to react, not to worry, not to fret, not to melt down.

He often reminds me of the sea of glass around His throne. The sea of glass has no waves or ripples. It is undisturbed. It is a place of perfect peace. That sea of glass must be felt and seen around me as well. I must abide in Him, and stay in His rest and peace.

I can only do that through His help. And so I’m asking, “Lord, please help me. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”